Confession: I’ve become a fan of getting it on outside the bedroom. I discovered this recently following a very raunchy night positioned on top of a mailbox. But let me start from the beginning…
It is no secret that my Instagram is the home of absolute debauchery on a Monday night.
I host a ‘Tell me a saucy secret’ confessional where very naughty (but actually very sane and normal) followers send through their sexy confessions anonymously (thanks so a brilliant app that removes all identification).
I choose a picture to go with the cheeky secret before reposting and it is a LOT of fun.
This week, I got two entries that both confessed similar things: they were getting frisky outside of the bedroom.
Jana Hocking [pictured] was surprised to have two fans confess that they were getting ‘frisky’ outside the bedroom to her
Confession 1 said: ‘I was feeling very frisky one night in the back of a taxi, so I straddled my man and started having sex with him. The taxi driver said nothing while we were at it, I think he enjoyed it, too.’
Confession 2 said: ‘I work in a beauty salon. A couple of times when the shop is closed, I’ve brought men to the salon… I’ve given them an oil massage and we’ve had hot sex on the treatment bed while people are walking past the shop outside. No one knows!’
It made me think of my very own recent dalliance. It was about a month ago that I got hot and heavy with a gent on my mailbox.
I should mention that I live in an apartment building that houses many people and the mailbox is at the front entrance. Oh, and I should also mention that I live in Bondi – which is hardly quiet. There are lots of people walking around the area at all hours.
So, how did this come about? Well, I had been at a long, fabulous, boisterous lunch and it had carried on to the night – as all good lunches do.
We ended up at a bar where an ex-fling just happened to be, and of course, we got flirting. I eventually left to go home to my cosy Uber Eats order and a replay of Clarkson’s Farm. So wholesome. Before ting in came a text from ‘said’ fling.
‘You were looking hot tonight.’
Jana recalled a ‘dalliance’ she shared with an ex-flame that saw the couple getting ‘hot and heavy’ over Jana’s mailbox
Oh, here we go, I thought. The issue I have with this guy is that he is my kryptonite. Yes, he has the ability to weaken all my senses. I’m very aware he is not boyfriend material, and yet, 30 minutes later he is out the front of my apartment waiting for me to let him in.
I told myself that he was definitely not staying, so I decided to go out and just say a quick hello, perhaps a kiss, and then head back to my comfy warm bed by myself.
Well, spoiler alert: it didn’t exactly go to plan.
I ran outside in my silk nightie and straight into his arms. We were soon making out heavily against the mailbox and I remembered that he is a ridiculously good kisser.
The passion was on fire, and so when he hiked up my nightie – I literally lost my mind. Within approximately three minutes it was all over, and we were giggling like naughty school kids.
I ran back inside with a big cheeky smile on my face. The next morning, I kept thinking back to that reckless moment. Thank gawwwd no one decided to come home. It was like a live-OnlyFans video. But for FREE.
And I know I should regret it, yes it was very irresponsible, blah blah blah, but I don’t, because for a few glorious minutes I really felt alive. It was sneaky, sexy, and fun.
I decided to see if others were prone to this sort of behaviour, so back I went to my trusty Instagram and asked my followers: ‘Where is the cheekiest place you’ve got it on (outside the bedroom)?’
I was expecting a couple of replies, varying from ‘in the car’ to ‘at the pool’ but it turns out we’re ALL just a little bit wild.
Jana was surprised when many people confessed to having sex in public places, including on a caged Ferris wheel, at the Centennial Park outdoor movie theatre, and in a pool in Barcelona
I was inundated with answers. Inundated I tell you! They included the following:
Caged Ferris wheel.
At university in one of the music practice rooms … which have no locks.
In a pool at a resort in Barcelona, which was busy in the middle of the day.
Centennial Park at the outdoor movies.
On a flight over the Atlantic in a first class seat whilst everyone was asleep.
In a pool at a resort in Barcelona, it was busy in the middle of the day.
Sounds weird, but… a graveyard late one night after the village pub closed… I’m ashamed ha.
In the back of a horse float while driving to the track to pick the horse up.
AFL sports field dugout/interchange bench whilst on the way home after a night out.
A water park after dark (a water slide, to be precise).
Hundreds of confessions came flooding in, with many revealing the shocking places they’ve done the deed, such as in the corner of a packed bar and inside their boss’s office
In a Target stores change room.
In the corner of a packed bar.
Boss’s office after a work party.
In a speedboat in a shed on a farm.
In the back seat of a wife’s friends mini cooper she let us take on a date while she babysat.
Shower at work during work hours.
On the back of a 4-wheel motorbike whilst stopped in the woods.
Emergency stairs at work, having worked out that floor above was vacant.
A married woman’s brand new range that her husband had just bought for her … on Valentine’s Day!
Parliament House viewing area.
In one of those little natural rock cave structures south end of the beach (Midday, full light!!).
‘I say anything that makes you feel alive and gives you a saucy core memory to think of when you are old and grey makes for a worthy adventure,’ said Jana
And on and on and on came the confessions.
Safe to say, most of us have got a little frisky outside the bedroom when the mood has got us going. It sure made me feel a lot less guilty about my mailbox action.
Well, that was until another ex-slid into my DM’s to remind me that we had once got it on in a paddock amongst the cows. Good lord, am I an exhibitionist without every realising it?
Either way, I say anything that makes you feel alive and gives you a saucy core memory to think of when you are old and grey makes for a worthy adventure.
Heck, nude up! Just make sure you don’t get caught.